Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name:

a = snickle
b = doombah
c = goober
d = cheesey
e = crusty
f = greasy
g = dumbo
h = farcus
i = dorky
j = doofus
k = funky
l = boobie
m = sleezy 
n= sloopy
o = fluffy
p = stinky
q = slimy
r = dorfus
s = snooty 
t = tootsie
u = dipsy
v = sneezy
w = liver
x = skippy
y = dinky
z = zippy

Use the second letter of your middle name to determine the first half of
your new last name:

a = dippin 
b = feather 
c = giggle 
d = burger 
e = chicken 
f = barffy 
g = lizard 
h = waffle 
i = farkle 
j = monkey 
k = flippin 
l = fricken 
m = bubble 
n = rhino 
o = potty 
p = hamster 
q = buckle 
r = gizzard 
s = lickin 
t = snickle 
u = chuckle 
v = pickle 
w = hubble 
x = dingle 
y = gorilla 
z = girdle

Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your
new last name:

a = butt 
b = boob 
c = face 
d = nose 
e = hump 
f = breath 
g = pants 
h = shorts 
i = lips 
j = honker 
k = head 
l = tush 
m = chunks 
n = dunkin 
o = brains 
p = biscuits 
q = toes 
r = doodle 
s = fanny 
t = sniffer 
u = sprinkles 
v = frack 
w = squirt 
x = humperdinck 
y = hiney 
z = juice